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[Motivation Monday] Feeling Stuck? Read This!

Being stuck (whether it’s in a dreadful routine, a toxic relationship, or unhealthy habits) manifests differently for everyone, but it doesn’t go unnoticed. Slowly but surely, you start feeling bored, anxious, frustrated, and even empty among many other equally unpleasant feelings. In other words, if you’re stuck, you know it… even if you can’t bring yourself to admit it out loud.

PLJ Income - The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any

You need to free yourself from that feeling, because the longer you stay caught in that web, the harder it’ll be to get out of it.

Feeling stuck often happens when you either don’t have a clue about what to do with your life, or when you know exactly what you want, but you don’t quite know how to make it happen. These may seem like opposite reasons, but actually, they both come from the same place: fear and insecurity.

When you start listening to fear’s little voice inside your head that only reminds you of your failures and flaws, it starts taking over. Turn its volume down and do everything you can to ignore it.

Fear and other feelings of inadequacy have a purpose; they try to protect us from outside danger. It’s completely normal to have those feelings… but you’ve got to know when to listen and when to move on. Don’t let fear and insecurity keep you stuck.

Of course, all of this is much easier said than done. Here are five steps you can take to build yourself up and get unstuck.

1. Change your perception.

Honestly, you might not even be as stuck as you think you are. Things can get us down, but at the end of the day, we have to remind ourselves how lucky we are and how much we have. Dedicate some time every day to this activity.

You can start right now. Go ahead and count your blessings. Start by being grateful for everything we usually take for granted: being alive, having a roof over of our heads and a bed to sleep on. Then, move on to other things like having people who care about you. List everything you can think of and that you are genuinely grateful for.

Gratitude is a proven way to make you feel relaxed. It changes your perception by making you focus on what you have instead of what you don’t.

2. Take care of your personal and financial well-being.

Once you’re stuck, it becomes awfully easy to lose yourself because you don’t have enough energy or motivation. Don’t let this happen. You deserve to take care of yourself.

Make sure you sleep and eat properly and never self-medicate. Taking care of your well-being is a sign of self-love and confidence. Don’t neglect your body and mind. You owe it to yourself.

Evaluate your financial well-being as well. All sorts of other problems stem from financial issues, so it’s very important that you know how to be financially fit. This will really give you some much-needed peace of mind.

If you don’t already know, learn how savings and investment accounts work and get yourself acquainted with some basic economics. Take care of yourself in all areas. You’ll be thankful for it.

3. Do something productive… now.

Start with something small like going for a walk, cleaning up, or simply getting out of your pajamas and putting on your favorite outfit. Don’t wait for a special occasion… after all, what could be more special than taking care of yourself?

Once you’ve done a seemingly small but productive task, do something you enjoy but that also challenges you. Get that recipe right, call that old high school friend just to catch up, paint, draw, color, make a donation to a charity of your choice, create a blog… there are endless possibilities.

Being productive takes your mind away from fear and speculation, and at the same time, it helps you to get things done. Start with something small (or big, if you’d like) but please start now.

No excuses allowed.

4. Practice some introspection.

Everything happens for a reason. Why are you feeling this way? What is it that you’re really craving?

Introspection doesn’t have to be hard if you do it your way, and it’ll help you get to the root of your problems. Do anything that resonates with you and allows you to get to know your inner thoughts and feelings. Maybe it’s chanting some mantras, practicing yoga, or having an “enjoy the silence” moment in the middle of your day. It’s up to you.

Give yourself the time to practice some introspection so that you’re able to hear the other “voices” within you, and not just the mean, fearful one.

Whatever it is that gets you in that soul-searching mood, make sure to challenge yourself and try to see the same issue from several points of view. When you’re stuck, it’s extremely hard to look at things from different perspectives. Challenge yourself and realize that neither your actions nor your thoughts have to be black and white. There are always more options.

5. Stop comparing yourself to others.

Comparing yourself to others will leave you feeling exhausted. If you’re constantly thinking about what others do and measure your own triumphs in comparison to theirs, you’re going to remain stuck.

Why? By picturing others happily achieving their goals and becoming successful, you’re chasing an unattainable idea of perfection. Do not confuse someone’s social media profile or magazine cover pictures with their entire lives. There’s no such thing as perfection, and we all make mistakes.

When you stop comparing yourself to others, you’ll feel free to live your own life and follow your path at the pace you’re supposed to.

If taking a peek into someone else’s life inspires you, then by all means, go ahead and use it to motivate you. But otherwise, avoid the all-too-common comparison game. It’s not easy, but it is necessary for your happiness.

It is possible to get unstuck. Follow these steps and make the wise decision to believe that you can improve your life.

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[Financial Friday] Important Changes to Social Security Claiming Strategies

The Bipartisan Budget Act of 2015 included a section titled “Closure of Unintended Loopholes” that ends two Social Security claiming strategies that have become increasingly popular over the last several years. These two strategies, known as “file and suspend” and “restricted application” for a spousal benefit, have often been used to optimize Social Security income for married couples.

Social Security check

If you have not yet filed for Social Security, it’s important to understand how these new rules could affect your retirement strategy. Depending on your age, you may still be able to take advantage of the expiring claiming options. The changes should not affect current Social Security beneficiaries and do not apply to survivor benefits.

File and suspend

Under the previous rules, an individual who had reached full retirement age could file for retired worker benefits–typically to enable a spouse to file for spousal benefits–and then suspend his or her benefit. By doing so, the individual would earn delayed retirement credits (up to 8% annually) and claim a higher worker benefit at a later date, up to age 70. Meanwhile, his or her spouse could be receiving spousal benefits. For some married couples, especially those with dual incomes, this strategy increased their total combined lifetime benefits.

Under the new rules, which are effective as of April 30, 2016, a worker who reaches full retirement age can still file and suspend, but no one can collect benefits on the worker’s earnings record during the suspension period. This strategy effectively ends the file-and-suspend strategy for couples and families.

The new rules also mean that a worker cannot later request a retroactive lump-sum payment for the entire period during which benefits were

suspended. (This previously available claiming option was helpful to someone who faced a change of circumstances, such as a serious illness.)

Tip: If you are age 66 or older before the new rules take effect, you may still be able to take advantage of the combined file-and-suspend and spousal/dependent filing strategy.

Restricted application

Under the previous rules, a married person who had reached full retirement age could file a “restricted application” for spousal benefits after the other spouse had filed for Social Security worker benefits. This allowed the individual to collect spousal benefits while earning delayed retirement credits on his or her own work record. In combination with the file-and-suspend option, this enabled both spouses to earn delayed retirement credits while one spouse received a spousal benefit, a type of “double dipping” that was not intended by the original legislation.

Under the new rules, an individual eligible for both a spousal benefit and a worker benefit will be “deemed” to be filing for whichever benefit is higher and will not be able to change from one to the other later.

Tip: If you reached age 62 before the end of December 2015, you are grandfathered under the old rules. If your spouse has filed for Social Security worker benefits, you can still file a restricted application for spouse-only benefits at full retirement age and claim your own worker benefit at a later date.

Basic Social Security claiming options remain unchanged. You can file for a permanently reduced benefit starting at age 62, receive your full benefit at full retirement age, or postpone filing for benefits and earn delayed retirement credits, up to age 70.

Although some claiming options are going away, plenty of planning opportunities remain, and you may benefit from taking the time to make an informed decision about when to file for Social Security.

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Merging Your Money When You Marry

Getting married is exciting, but it brings many challenges. One such challenge that you and your spouse will have to face is how to merge your finances.

Planning carefully and communicating clearly are important, because the financial decisions that you make now can have a lasting impact on your future.

1. Discuss your financial goals

The first step in mapping out your financial future together is to discuss your financial goals.

Start by making a list of your short-term goals (e.g., paying off wedding debt, new car, vacation) and long-term goals (e.g., having children, your children’s college education, retirement).

Then, determine which goals are most important to you. Once you’ve identified the goals that are a priority, you can focus your energy on achieving them.

2. Prepare a budget

Next, you should prepare a budget that lists all of your income and expenses over a certain time period (e.g., monthly, annually).

You can designate one spouse to be in charge of managing the budget, or you can take turns keeping records and paying the bills. If both you and your spouse are going to be involved, make sure that you develop a record-keeping system that both of you understand.

And remember to keep your records in a joint filing system so that both of you can easily locate important documents. Begin by listing your sources of income (e.g., salaries and wages, interest, dividends).

Then, list your expenses (it may be helpful to review several months of entries in your checkbook and credit card bills). Add them up and compare the two totals. Hopefully, you get a positive number, meaning that you spend less than you earn.

If not, review your expenses and see where you can cut down on your spending.

3. Bank accounts–separate or joint?

At some point, you and your spouse will have to decide whether to combine your bank accounts or keep them separate.

Maintaining a joint account does have advantages, such as easier record keeping and lower maintenance fees. However, it’s sometimes more difficult to keep track of how much money is in a joint account when two individuals have access to it.

Of course, you could avoid this problem by making sure that you tell each other every time you write a check or withdraw funds from the account. Or, you could always decide to maintain separate accounts.

4. Credit cards

If you’re thinking about adding your name to your spouse’s credit card accounts, think again. When you and your spouse have joint credit, both of you will become responsible for 100 percent of the credit card debt.

In addition, if one of you has poor credit, it will negatively impact the credit rating of the other. If you or your spouse does not qualify for a card because of poor credit, and you are willing to give your spouse account privileges anyway, you can make your spouse an authorized user of your credit card.

An authorized user is not a joint cardholder and is therefore not liable for any amounts charged to the account. Also, the account activity won’t show up on the authorized user’s credit record. But remember, you remain responsible for the account.

5. Insurance

If you and your spouse have separate health insurance coverage, you’ll want to do a cost/benefit analysis of each plan to see if you should continue to keep your health coverage separate.

For example, if your spouse’s health plan has a higher deductible and/or co-payments or fewer benefits than those offered by your plan, he or she may want to join your health plan instead.

You’ll also want to compare the rate for one family plan against the cost of two single plans.

It’s a good idea to examine your auto insurance coverage, too. If you and your spouse own separate cars, you may have different auto insurance carriers.

Consider pooling your auto insurance policies with one company; many insurance companies will give you a discount if you insure more than one car with them.

If one of you has a poor driving record, however, make sure that changing companies won’t mean paying a higher premium.

6. Employer-sponsored retirement plans

If both you and your spouse participate in an employer-sponsored retirement plan, you should be aware of each plan’s characteristics.

Review each plan together carefully and determine which plan provides the best benefits. If you can afford it, you should each participate to the maximum in your own plan.

If your current cash flow is limited, you can make one plan the focus of your retirement strategy. Here are some helpful tips:

►If both plans match contributions, determine which plan offers the best match and take full advantage of it

►Compare the vesting schedules for the employer’s matching contributions

►Compare the investment options offered by each plan–the more options you have, the more likely you are to find an investment mix that suits your needs

►Find out whether the plans offer loans–if you plan to use any of your contributions for certain expenses (e.g., your children’s college education, a down payment on a house), you may want to participate in the plan that has a loan provision

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[Motivation Monday] How to Make Your Goals Happen

We all have hopes, dreams, and goals. We imagine how great it would be to make them all real, but the hard truth is that without actually planning and taking action, our goals will stay daydreams.

PLJ Income - a goal without a plan is just a wish

However, there are thousands of women who are indeed capable of setting goals and achieving them. So, why should it be any different in your case?

Here’s another truth: you can turn your wishes into reality by action planning. Very few people make it because “they’re just lucky.” Most of the time, great amounts of creativity, perseverance, self-discipline, and positivity are involved in achieving satisfying lives. Having an action plan to follow allows you to focus on your goals and stay on the right track.

So, let’s get right down to it and see what you can do to make your goals happen.

Get real.

Yes, you are capable of designing and redesigning your life as you wish. Feel free to set your goals as high as you want to, but make sure to be realistic when you plan how to achieve them.

Let’s use one of the most common goals as an example: improving your financial status. Making a helpful action plan doesn’t involve simply declaring you want to be financially savvy or writing it down. Sure, those are important baby steps that can help you get clear about what you want and serve as reminders to go get it, but by no means is that a proper action plan.

What you should do:
Break down your main goal into several attainable little goals.

Planning to “improve financial status” is ambiguous, and it may take a long time. If you break it down into smaller goals such as “keep track of my spending habits,” “check my bank account balance once a week,” and “look for savings accounts,” it will help you stay on the right track and keep you motivated because you’ll see yourself taking action sooner.

Planning realistic mini-goals will also help you see that—no matter what your goal is—you can make it happen.

Prioritize.

Most of us don’t just have one goal, but many. Trying to achieve all our goals at the same time while carrying on with our everyday activities can turn out to be very overwhelming.

That’s where prioritization comes in. Getting into the “first things first” state of mind is extremely important.

Time is the most valuable resource you’ve got, so reflect on how you spend it and evaluate if you’re making wise choices.

PLJ Income - Most of us spend too much time on what is urgent and not enough time on what is important

What you should do:
Focus on what’s really important.

What’s really important to you? Do that first.

Otherwise, you’ll find yourself busy attending to common, everyday stuff (checking e-mail, binge-watching TV, common chores) and by the end of the day, you won’t have spent enough time on what really matters. Once you set your priorities straight, action planning won’t seem so difficult.

Plan from A to Z.

No matter how much positive thinking we practice and how much we plan ahead, sometimes things just don’t turn out the way we want. Most people tend to have a Plan B, in case things don’t work out perfectly, though not so many have a plan Z. That is, having a contingency plan for the absolute worst-case scenario. This may sound counterintuitive, but when you actually think and plan your way out of an undesirable outcome, you can reduce your stress levels.

What you should do:
Take a deep breath and start visualizing what can go wrong with Plan A.

After that, consider your options and have different, concise action plans. In all honesty, doing this can be a bit unpleasant, but once you’re finished, you’ll be prepared for whatever may come. Planning from A to Z will make you feel like you’ve got things together.

Review your progress.

Once you’ve set your heart and mind on a goal, it’s relatively easy to feel motivated and take action.

Let’s say you’ve been saving up some money because that’s your goal. What would happen if you didn’t keep an exact record of your expenses? How much exactly are you saving and what did you give up to save it? What are you planning to do with your savings and how far are you from that “bigger” goal?

If you find yourself unable to answer these questions, you’ll be lacking motivation within a couple of days – no matter how good your intentions may be.

What you should do:
Keep track of your progress.

Review how far you are from your goal and answer the tough questions as needed. If there’s something else you should be doing to move forward, schedule it and do it.

On the other hand, keeping track of your progress will let you know if you’re moving closer to achieving what you want. When that happens, give yourself a well-deserved pat on the back.

Commit.

Wishes require imagination and excitement; goals require commitment.

Motivation and passion won’t always be at an all-time high; that’s why when you truly want something, you’ve got to commit.

Make a promise to yourself, a friend, or the universe: whatever it takes to hold yourself accountable and take responsibility for your own actions.

What you should do:
Find a balance.

There will inevitably be days when you just won’t have the energy or time to take that next step in your action plan. Talk yourself through the rough patches from a loving place, instead of thinking that you won’t be able to accomplish what you want and how much easier it would be to drop everything and stay in your comfort zone.

Remember that you’ve made a commitment and honor your word. Don’t let stress or fear get the best of you. Instead, if you’re feeling lousy, take a no-guilt break to recharge and carry on.

There are no big secrets or magic tricks when it comes to achieving your goals. There’s just a lot of hard work and planning involved. So don’t wait any longer and design a proper plan that allows you to take action.

You are perfectly capable of turning wishes into goals and goals into realities.
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[Financial Friday] What To Do When a Saver Marries a Spender

If you’re a penny pincher but your spouse is penny wise and pound foolish, money arguments may frequently erupt. Couples who have opposite philosophies regarding saving and spending often have trouble finding common ground. Thinking of yourselves as two sides of the same coin may help you appreciate your financial differences.

What To Do When A Saver Marries A Spender

Heads or tails, saver or spender

If you’re a saver, you love having money in the bank, investing in your future, and saving for a rainy day. You probably hate credit card debt and spend money cautiously. Your spender spouse may seem impulsive, prompting you to think, “Don’t you care about our future?” But you may come across as controlling or miserly to your spouse who thinks, “Just for once, can’t you loosen up? We really need some things!”

Such different outlooks can lead to mistrust and resentment. But are your characterizations fair? Your money habits may have a lot to do with how you were raised and your personal experience. Being a saver or a spender may come naturally; instead of assigning blame, try to see your spouse’s side.

Start by discussing your common values. What do you want to accomplish together? Recognize that spenders may be more focused on short-term goals, while savers may be more focused on long-term goals. Ultimately, whether you’re saving for a vacation, a car, college, or retirement, your money will be spent on something. It’s simply a matter of deciding together when and how to spend it.

A penny for your thoughts?

Sometimes couples avoid talking about money because they are afraid to argue. But talking about money may actually help you and your spouse avoid conflict. Scheduling regular money meetings could help you gain a better understanding of your finances and provide a forum for handling disagreements.

To help ensure a productive discussion, establish some ground rules. For example, you might set a time limit, insist that both of you come prepared, and take a break in the event the discussion becomes heated. Communication and compromise are key. Don’t assume you know what your spouse is thinking–ask–and be willing to negotiate. Here are some questions to get started.

  • What does money represent to you? Security? Freedom? The opportunity to help others
  • What are your short-term and long-term savings goals?
  • How much money is coming in and how much is going out? Never assume that your spouse knows as much about your finances as you do.
  • How comfortable are you with debt, including mortgage debt, credit card debt, and loans?
    Who should you spend money on? Do you agree on how much to give to your children or how much to spend on gifts to family members and friends, for example?
  • What rules would you like to apply to purchases? One option is to set a limit on how much one spouse can spend on an item without consulting the other.
  • Would you like to set aside some discretionary money for each of you? Then you would be free to save or spend those dollars without having to justify your decision.

Once you’ve explored these topics, you can create a concrete budget or spending plan that reflects your financial personalities. To satisfy you and your spouse, make savings an “expense” and allow some room in the budget for unexpected expenses. And track your progress. Having regular meetings to go over your finances will enable you to celebrate your financial successes or identify areas where you need to improve. Be willing to make adjustments if necessary.

Finally, recognize that getting on the same page is going to take some work. When you got married, you promised to love your spouse for richer or poorer. Maybe it’s time to put your money where your mouth is.

 

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